How to Be Happy With Yourself

I have a deep rooted belief that you can do extraordinary things with your life when you are happy with yourself. As a communication coach, I’ve constantly seen a correlation between these two factors.

People who are happy with themselves are more authentic and more sociable; they have more initiative, take more risks and bounce back from failure faster. All these traits create a context where success and fulfillment happen a lot easier.

Being happy with yourself is certainly a wonderful condition, but it is also not very common. I find that most people struggle with limiting beliefs and self-image issues that prevent them from being in this condition.

If you want to be happy with yourself, chances are that you’re gonna have to work for it. Here are the most important ideas I think you want to apply:

1. Know Your Strengths

People who are displeased with themselves often believe that they have nothing of quality to offer. This is of course, baloney, but since they are unable to see their strengths, it seems like the truth to them.

For this reason, it’s important to know your strengths. We all have strengths, natural qualities that we are born with or we have developed. Unfortunately, many of us are not very aware of them. One of the best things you can do is to commit yourself to discovering your entire personality and clearly understanding your strengths.

2. Discover the Qualities under the Flaws

I’m frequently told that I’m stubborn. At one point, I thought this was a big flaw of mine. Eventually, in my quest for self-knowledge, I’ve realized that it was actually a quality that others labeled as a weakness: most of my opinions and decisions were based on solid logic and facts, and I knew this, so I was very firm in them. This came off to many people as stubbornness.

Many qualities are often labeled by ourselves or by others using words that reflect weaknesses; but if you look at the practical effects they create, you will notice that they are in fact, qualities. Take a good look at what seem to be your flaws: could some of them be strengths in disguise?

3. Annihilate Perfectionism

You cannot be happy with yourself if you ask of yourself to be perfect, to have no flaws and to make no mistakes. Perfectionism will kill your self-esteem and keep you in a perpetual cycle of self-hate.

It’s fundamental to realize that you don’t need to be perfect and perfection is an insane expectation, even if it’s very common. Don’t just know this at a conscious, rational level; let this idea sink in and make it a part of your very psychological fabric.

4. Learn and Grow Constantly

While perfectionism is insane, wanting to learn and grow is a very healthy thing. Psychologists believe that our most complex and our defining trait as human beings is the need for self-actualization: we want to be all that we can be. In order to do this, we need to constantly learn and grow.

Set specific personal development goals for yourself and work on achieving them. Read books, take classes or work with a coach; practice consistently all that you find valuable. When you know that you’re always improving and becoming a better person, you naturally tend to be very happy with yourself.

Do not expect for a miracle method that will make you love yourself forever. Reaching and maintaining a state of happiness with yourself requires just like growing in any other area, consistent practice. On this journey, you will find perseverance and the ability to have fun with it to be your best companions.

Enjoy yourself and keep walking!

Eduard Ezeanu provides communication coaching and helps people put their best foot forward in communication. He also writes on his blog, People Skills Decoded, and you can follow him on Twitter at @EduardSays

Live Life Fully! 10 Things That Can Keep You From It

Have you ever noticed that when you start a new hobby or sport that you have always wanted to start, you feel especially energized and excited about it? You probably notice a similar feeling when you get out of your regular routine, whether it is for a special event or for a vacation. Even if it is something very simple, these can be times when you are living life fully and it is energizing!

As I was thinking about this phenomenon, I recognized that the opposite happens when you are not living life fully. It’s draining to resist living life fully. Your energy becomes lower and you tend to lack excitement. There are many things that can pull us into this fatigued state of going through the motions.

1. Fear

Fear is probably the biggest reason many of us do not always live our lives fully. Especially if you are doing something new, it can be intimidating and scary. If you allow the fear to stop you from doing something you know you really want to do, you are allowing that fear to keep you from living your life fully. When you overcome that fear, you feel energized and excited.

2. Television

That might seem silly to some. However, I contend that watching others either pretend to live or watching them actually live (in the case of reality TV) is NOT living your life fully. I have never in my life heard people discussing television shows as much as I hear them now. I believe it is the ultimate distraction from living. So, limiting your TV time will give you more time to actually live.

3. Clutter

Being overwhelmed by too much stuff in your physical environment can make you feel overwhelmed in general. Every item in your space is something you need to take care of in some way. It can take away from time you would otherwise have to enjoy life. Of course, there are some things you have that you do enjoy. These are not things I would consider clutter. It is the things in your space that you don’t enjoy, that simply take up space and energy that you don’t want to spend on them. Getting rid of excess clutter can help free you to enjoy the things that really matter.

4. Resentment

Holding on to feelings of resentment toward people you feel have wronged you can distract you from living life fully. You may feel and even be totally justified with your feelings for things others have done that hurt you. However, if you hold on to those feelings, you are only harming yourself further. If you find you are having difficulty letting those types of feelings go, one thing you can do is write a letter to get them out, then burn it, flush it or mail it to Santa Claus. Whatever works for you to feel what you feel, then just let it go.

5. Judgment

Spending your time and energy in judgment of others can keep you from living your life fully. You will never have a complete understanding of another person’s motivations because you are not in their shoes. If you find yourself thinking or saying that another person “should” or “should not” do something or do it a certain way, you are judging them. They are not necessarily wrong for doing things differently and you are wasting yourself by attempting to force your ways upon them. Again, this ultimately only hurts you. Let go of your judgments of others and accept them for who they are. This will free you to live your life more fully.

6. Wallowing in Lethargy

When you feel low in energy and unmotivated, the worst thing you can do is give into it for an extended period of time. the longer you stay inactive, the less motivated you will be to become more active. Activity energizes you. If you are feeling unmotivated to do anything, get out and do something!

7. Chaos

When your life is too hectic and chaotic, it can keep you from living life fully. No matter what your circumstances are, be sure to always take time out for you. Whenever you are able to, simplify your life. Get creative with this if you need to. You might be able to simplify more than you think. Regardless of how difficult it is for you to simplify, always take at least a few minutes for yourself every day. Otherwise, what is the point of it all?

8. Drama

Do I even need to elaborate? It’s pointless and petty. I don’t do drama. I’ll leave it at that.

9. Guilt

Guilt is essentially resentment toward yourself for things you have done to “wrong” others. The reasons this keeps you from living life fully are basically the same as for resentment. If you really feel you have wronged someone and want to make up for it somehow, do what you can to do so if you believe it will truly make the situation better. If there is no way to do that directly or doing so will make things worse, write a letter to get it all out & get rid of the letter in a way that helps you let it go.

10. Feeling You Don’t Deserve It

If you find yourself in constant patterns of not living life fully, it could be that you have a subconscious (or conscious) belief that you don’t deserve to life life fully. We all deserve it. Focus on the reasons you deserve it. Write them down. Look at them daily.

There may be many more things that keep us from living life fully. These are my current thoughts on the matter. If you can relate to even one of them and do something to change it, maybe you can get a little more out of life than you were before. Just writing this has helped me realize how I still have many things I can shift in my own life to live it more fully. I always have lots of room for improvement!

Life is a journey and I repeatedly remind myself to enjoy that journey!

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by Jen Kunkel
Connect For Success at http://www.jenkunkel.com
Daily Blog: http://jenkunkel.com/extraordinarylives4ordinarypeople/

5 Effective Ways to Improve Attitude – RIGHT NOW!

Great Ways to Start Your Day

“Good morning! Isn’t it a beautiful day?” Well, you can make or break your day in the next hour or so. How you start your morning has a huge impact on how the rest of your day will go. Sticking to a routine may help you have a better day.

The early morning hours are usually very calm and peaceful. Because of that, if you want a little time to get your head screwed on straight before your day starts, you should try to get up at a decent time in the morning.

Perhaps one of the most useful routines is to open all the windows in your house as soon as you wake up (weather permitting, of course.) This will help you to feel energized and refreshed, ready to face the day that lays ahead of you. Brush your teeth and drink a few glasses of water and you will feel almost ready to face the day.

Exercise is another great way to start your day. Do whatever works for you, whether that be taking a brisk walk or jog in the morning, jumping on a mini-trampoline, or perhaps yoga and meditation is your style. Remember, all of these are also a great way to stay in shape.

If you are the type of person who likes to take showers or bathes in the morning, make sure you use nice warm water, as this will help you feel refreshed as well.

Never skip breakfast. This is said to be the most important meal of the day. What you eat for breakfast will have an effect on how you feel and work throughout the day. Make sure you have a nutritious breakfast, not just junk food.

Now comes that part of the morning that most people dislike. Chore time. How can you make a time of drudgery become time well spent? Try playing upbeat music that you enjoy while you work. Or you could spend a few minutes reading a newspaper or book before you start your chores so that you will have something constructive to think about.

Before you leave the house or start your work, spend a few minutes making a list of things you would like to accomplish before the day is done. Also spend sufficient time on your looks. If you look good it will help lift your spirits. Try to look cheerful. If you look cheerful, most people will respond in kind, and that will make your day easier.

At the end of the day, reflect on how your day went. What were some things you could have done better? How will you do in the same circumstances tomorrow? Plan ahead for tomorrow and you will have a wonderful day.

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By Alex Ryan
If you enjoyed this article, find other articles on the antenna ball and antenna topper by visiting his blog.

Gratitude is a Key to Happiness

Have you ever said thanks to god for anything? How was the feeling?

We feel much fulfilled while we say thank you because this makes us feel that we got something we needed. It also makes opposite person feel that what he or she gave to us is valuable.

God gave us this wonderful life and we should be thankful for the same. We pray to god for the things we want but we never say thanks for what we already have. Even if we say thanks it would be only once or twice. God gave us many gifts which we enjoy every day so we should be thankful every day.

“We often take for granted the very things that most deserve our gratitude.” – Cynthia Ozick

Think this way how will you feel when in a train you give your birth to someone standing and that person without saying thanks sits on your place. You will definitely feel bad that you gave your valuable place to someone who didn’t value it. I am not saying god will feel bad if you won’t say thanks but I am saying that you will feel good if you say thanks.

If you want to be happy then you have to release all your negative thinking by replacing it with positive thinking. Gratitude will remove all negative energy from your mind because you will start focusing on things you have instead of what you don’t have.

“Happiness is itself a kind of gratitude.” - Joseph Wood Krutch

All the self help author suggest you to practice gratitude daily and I am no exception to that. Gratitude is the first thing I do in the morning. I say thanks to god for my life, health, my wife, my parents, my friends, knowledge, strength, opportunities and many more things. I feel fulfilled while practicing Gratitude. I feel like I am the luckiest guy in the world that I have many reasons to celebrate every day of my life. Gratitude also helps me to focus on my goals. It makes me realize that if I can achieve what I have then I can definitely achieve my other goals. It gives me amazing confidence. Gratitude actually prepares you to fight against all the odds and makes you happy.

“Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.”

You can prepare your gratitude journal where you can write things for which you are thankful. Every day you can add your list. It is not that we should be thankful for big things or events in our life. Small things or events also give you immense happiness. I say thank you even when I get a place in a bus or train. I also write everyday in my gratitude journal. I have also kept reminders in my mobile which rings at every three hours and I start thinking of events or things or people I am thankful for. Promise yourself that you will think of five things you feel gratitude for and I guarantee that you will find ten things.

Start Gratitude today, say thanks to god, to universe and even to your parents. In search of things we don’t have with us we forget to enjoy things we have with us.

“Let us be grateful to people who make us happy; they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom.” – Marcel Proust

At the end I want to dedicate a poem from an unknown author.

Be Thankful

Be thankful that you don’t already have everything you desire,
If you did, what would there be to look forward to?

Be thankful when you don’t know something
For it gives you the opportunity to learn.

Be thankful for the difficult times.
During those times you grow.

Be thankful for your limitations
Because they give you opportunities for improvement.

Be thankful for each new challenge
Because it will build your strength and character.

Be thankful for your mistakes
They will teach you valuable lessons.

Be thankful when you’re tired and weary
Because it means you’ve made a difference.

It is easy to be thankful for the good things.
A life of rich fulfillment comes to those who are
also thankful for the setbacks.

GRATITUDE can turn a negative into a positive.
Find a way to be thankful for your troubles
and they can become your blessings.

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by Samir Kunvaria
For more articles on self improvement please visit http://www.samirworld.com

7 Ways For You to Be the Best You That You Possibly Can Be

Are you satisfied with your life and who you are? Are you living your life to the fullest possible? In this hectic crazy world it is very easy to lose sight of what is important. Many people have lost their self esteem and self respect. With the economy creating havoc in many peoples lives is it any wonder things are the way they are. There are so many people unemployed, many have lost their homes and families as well. And after losing all they had, they may also end up losing their most precious possession – themselves.

For many it is easy to give up, after all it is tough losing everyone one cherished and ‘loved’. I remember an expression I learned a long time ago, “when the going gets tough, the tough get going”. So I have to ask myself and you, are you tough? Do you have what it takes to tough it out? It is easy to give up and quit, but quitters never win. Do you want to be one of the quitters? I expect not, but life does throw us curves from time to time, the question really is how do we handle them? Here are seven suggestions for you to consider before you throw in the towel. Ponder these ideas and see how you can change and improve your life.

1. Do you know your purpose?

Everyone has a purpose, can you believe that, or do you see yourself as wandering through life with little or no direction. Are you hoping that things will work out, that you will find happiness, that prosperity will come knocking at your door? If you can find your life purpose you can turn around any situation ailing you at the moment. There are enough stories of people near the brink of total disaster or ruin who have found a purpose and turned it all around to become a success.

2. Do you know what your personal values are?

What is it that you value above all else? Do you know? Is it security, family, success, freedom, or just being happy? What is most important to you? If you do not know then how will you reconcile them to your purpose? Your purpose and values need to be aligned. Make a list of your values and compare it to your purpose.

3. Do you know what your needs are?

Have you been too busy taking care of everyone else that you have neglected yourself? Do you know what you need, or are you just satisfying everyone else. It is time to start taking care of yourself.

4. What are you passionate about?

Is there anything that you are passionate about. Find a bigger cause than yourself and get involved. There are many places where you can volunteer your time or services and by doing so you will get a better sense of self worth.

5. Are you living 100% on the outside instead of living from your heart?

Are you so busy looking outside that you have forgotten to go within? Perhaps you’ve heard the cliche, ‘go within or go without’. Do you take any time to sit quietly and listen to what is going on inside? Or are you like a leaf floating in the breeze.

6. Do you honor your skills?

What is it that makes you who you are? And if you are not sure then ask those close to you, you might be surprised what you hear. By sharing what you know and are good at you will increase your sense of self worth and self confidence.

7. Have you ever given of yourself and served others?

We are all part of humanity, living on this planet as individuals, yet at the same time as a family. Have you ever given back to the family, or to the planet? By giving of yourself you become richer in ways you may never have thought possible. Try it and see for yourself.

So the bottom line is regardless of your circumstances, or situation there is always hope. There are countless ways you can improve yourself and those around you. You are a child of the universe, there is not another one exactly like you. Please find your purpose and light your light so we may all see.

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Next, if you would like to find out more about Self Development and Healing, then visit Self Development and Healing now. To learn more about your health please visit Health Secrets Explained now.

Happiness – 15 Easy Ways to Feel Happy and Fulfilled Today and Every Day!

Happiness is our birthright. When we see a small baby we instinctively squeal with delight at his or her first smile. Our natural human instinct is to lean is towards happiness, but as time passes and life’s experiences unfold, we can sometimes lose our mojo. When that happens it can be hard to retain our sense of perspective and we can fall into the habit of negative thinking. Maybe money’s tight, or your relationship has ended, or you had a row with your best friend.

No matter what has happened to wipe that smile off your face, you must try to do whatever you can to define in a healthy, life affirming way, what happiness means to you. And I don’t mean eating another bar of chocolate or having another plate of macaroni cheese!

Here’s 15 steps to happiness you can start on today that will bring a smile to your face, if not get you laughing out loud!

1. Avoid negative people.

I don’t really need to expand on this one too much do I? You know who they are, and you know how they make you feel, and you know you need to avoid them. If you can’t avoid them altogether then at least keep them at arms length, and minimise your contact with them. Stick with the positive ones.

2. Stand in front of a mirror, look into your eyes and smile.

Tell yourself how wonderful you are and that you deserve to be happy. Do this a few times a day, even if it feels silly. This works wonders to lift your spirits!

3. Avoid wearing black clothes, and inject some colour into your wardrobe.

We tend to wear black when we want to make ourselves invisible and blend in with the walls (unless you’re a vampire or Count Dracula?) No but really, wearing brighter colours will cheer you up. Get some pinks to feel more feminine, blue to feel calm and orange to get that spark of creativity flowing!

4. Do some exercise and get some air into those lungs!

We all know that regular activity benefits us enormously, both mentally and physically, even if it’s just for 20 minutes a day. So take a brisk walk, run up and down your stairs a few times, do star jumps during the commercial breaks when you’re watching TV. This will ensure you feel more energised and help you stay trim and fit, which will in turn have a knock-on positive effect on your mood.

5. Put on music that makes you happy, or with lyrics that cheer you up.

Try Bach’s Brandenburg Concerto’s or Mozart’s Ein Kleine Nachtmusik. If you prefer mainstream music then try Jimmy Cliff “I Can See Clearly Now” or Michael Jackson “The Way You Make Me Feel”, “My Love” by Justin Timberlake or even Rick Astley’s “Never Gonna Give You Up” to name but a few. Anything that’s definitely going to put a smile on your face.

6. Watch comedy shows, funny movies or go to a comedy night with your friends.

Happiness is the aim here and what could be better than laughing?

7. Decide to be happy.

Habits are formed very easily and if we simply decide to be happy then it will become a habit. Aristotle said “We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence then is not an act, but a habit.”

8. Say yes to your dreams.

All too often we want a better lifestyle, or a more fulfilling relationship, or a slimmer body, but we look at what we have now,which may be a far cry from the ideal life of our dreams, and in our frustration we kill the dream off before it’s even started to develop. Instead, let the seed of the dream take root, and you will find that in a very short time, things will start happening that will help turn that dream a reality. You might meet someone wonderful, or you might get a great new job offer, and this will happen simply because you said yes to your dreams and allowed them to unfold.

9. Fake it till you make it!

This is one of my personal favourites. It doesn’t mean if I act like a billionaire then I’m necessarily going to become one, but it does mean that my confidence is boosted, I’ll stand taller and feel elevated. All of these are going to make me feel happier, and I’ll give off a happier vibe, and as a result I’ll attract positive experiences and positive people. Cultivate an internal dialogue that’s always geared towards happiness.

10. Smile!

This is one of the best and most effective happiness tips I can give you. Try it now!

11. Bloom where you’re planted.

3 years ago, I had to move 200 miles away from my friends, my parents and my partner, and I hated it. My entire support network was gone overnight. I did everything I could to avoid putting roots down in my new home. I kept telling myself it was a temporary move, and that I’d be back before I knew it. And as might be expected, I got more and more miserable. So I decided to heed my own advice, and try to make the best of it. I joined a gym, I started to socialise more, made lots of new friends and now I know that wherever I find myself geographically, I can be happy mentally. And I am!

12. See the silver lining, because every cloud has one.

If a relationship has ended, consider the reasons it’s ended and be glad because now you can attract the person who is more suited to you – someone who wants to be with you, rather than the person who was happier with his friends. Someone who can’t wait to spend the rest of his life with you, rather than the person who hesitates or runs in the opposite direction when togetherness is mentioned. When you’re sick and your body isn’t as healthy as it was, use the time convalescing to review your lifestyle, your diet, and fitness routine. This will give you a renewed focus and allow your body to heal from a mentally positive perspective.

13. Have faith.

Believe and have faith in a Higher Power, whether that’s God, Allah, the Jedi Master or The Universal Great Lord, and trust that your happiness matters to that Higher Power. This will enhance your sense of value, as well as renewing your confidence and allowing you to relax into a happier frame of mind. Someone else has got your back, and you’re always safe.

14. Contribute.

Contribute to the community and help others in an area that means something to you. Run the marathon for charity or volunteer at a local charity shop. The beneficial attributes here are self explanatory.

15. Remember tomorrow is another day!

You get another chance to do it all over again, and the best part is you can improve on what you did today, tweak a few things here and there, and relax – it’s never going to be perfect. But you’ve done your best, and that’s all you ever need to do.

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Mumtaz Hussain believes passionately that every man, woman and child always deserves to feel fantastic about themselves. She is a single mum of two and she has successfully created a fabulous life for herself and her children. Find out more about me and get your free gift at http://todaymumtaz.blogspot.com

10 Time Saving Strategies That Will Also Increase Happiness

We all hope to get more time from our day. Most of us, I imagine also want to be happier. This article discusses ways to better manage your time that will help increase your overall mood.

1 Limit television watching to one hour a day

By setting this time restriction on your television habit, you have retrieved so much more time to do all those things you want to be doing. What’s more, time spent away from the television will be far more fulfilling and meaningful then merely watching others do their thing. Since you only have an hour, decide what you want to watch. If you can, record your favourites so you know you have something to look forward to each night. This way you are also taking control of TV time — watching what you enjoy, rather than whatever is on.

2 Get some exercise

You may be wondering how adding something to your day will save you time. Because exercise brings with it multiple benefits. It’s your stress reliever, your time-out for the day and your mood booster. You are also doing your body lots of good, which may help prevent health difficulties later on in life. Think of the time saved not having to go to the doctors? As a further happiness booster, it gives you the ideal opportunity to set and achieve your own personal goals and challenges. How satisfying.

3 Set and prioritise your goals

I’ve just mentioned setting goals as part of your exercise plan. It’s worth mentioning them in their own right however. If you can set and prioritise goals, it allows you to focus on doing the important things each and every day. Your goals can be short ones that are achieved in a day or longer ones that take months or even years to achieve. For longer goals, break them down into achievable chunks. As a consequence, not only are you getting things done, but you are giving meaning to your day, which is bound to help you feel happier.

4 Don’t waste your time on meaningless or pointless tasks

So if goals give you meaning, it makes sense to not waste your precious time on stuff that you get nothing from. I don’t mean routine tasks like the washing up, after all it can be satisfying having a clean house. I mean that one more game of solitaire that you’re playing because you’re procrastinating and are getting nothing from it. If you can identify what your pointless tasks are, resolve to stop doing them. You can make better use of your day. Ask yourself if it is getting you towards your goal?

5 Make lists

Each day, write down in order of importance, the things you need to do. Be as clear as possible, so you know what you should be doing. Having a list will give you focus. It will also help you feel organised and in control. Be realistic with your lists, however. Knowing you cannot accomplish absolutely everything will help ease a burden you may have created for yourself. At the end of each day, review your crossed-off items, and feel happy with all you have achieved. As for anything you didn’t get done – just put it on tomorrow’s list.

6 Stop multitasking

You may think that multitasking is a great way of using time effectively, after all you are doing two or more things at once. However, it just does not work. You cannot give your all to two tasks which means it is highly likely that one or both tasks will be completed less than satisfactorily. This means having to do them over. So save time and get it right the first time. You will end up feeling far more satisfied. What’s more, by engaging in activities this way, you put yourself in a great position to experience flow, which is a great source of happiness. With a flow experience you are totally focused on the job at hand and afterward feel pretty good about yourself.

7 Focus on the here and now

This relates to the previous point. By attending to what is going on right now, your concentration levels will be far greater. This means limiting your distractions, no matter what you are doing. Distractions come in varied forms: email, other people or your own thoughts. If you have a lot to do, it’s easy to fret about what may happen in the future, or what went wrong yesterday. By being present in the present, you are in the best position to ensure your future will turn out fine.

8 Get support from others

Don’t try going it alone. It won’t do your health and happiness much good. Being able to turn to others and ask for help, will relieve your stress. You may even live longer with supportive friends and/or partner in your life. Of course, to save time you really should delegate. It could be the help of a co-worker on a project or your teenage son’s assistance with the shopping. Hand whatever it is over to someone else, then trust them to get on with it.

9 Increase your courage

Do you have the courage to say no? When people ask you to do something, do you add it to your pile of duties? Even though you know you don’t have the time or you simply just do not want to do it? If you can be honest and true to yourself, you will feel so much better for it. You are freeing up valuable hours to do the things that are important to you. Honesty and courage are both character strengths that are worth nurturing.

10 Take a break

Working until you are burnt out is not time efficient. Nor is having less sleep, because you will end up working at half capacity. You need the mental and physical energy to get the most from the time available to you. So be okay taking regular breaks. A few minutes throughout the day, time off at weekends, short vacations (a long one would be even better) — it all makes a difference. And make sure you allow enough time to sleep each night. Life will feel more manageable, and you will feel more in control and ultimately happier.

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Copyright Julia Barnard

Julia Barnard is a counsellor and author living in Adelaide, Australia. You can discover more ways to be happy through her book: Promoting Happiness: a workbook to help you appreciate and get the most out of your life.